On This Faithful Day

Exactly a year ago, I lost someone whom I've known for my entire life. She was a victim to SLE. When my mum broke the news to me as I was walking to class in Nilai, I just couldn't believe the text she sent. I read, reread and reread again for at least 5 times before I realised what actually happened. My first thought was to drop everything that I was doing and take the first bus out of Nilai to the KTM station, and so I did. 

I attended her wake, feeling so helpless (Last year at this time, it was already Chinese New Year). I could feel the pain her family went through. Aimz was there. It has NEVER occurred to us that that day would arrive so soon. It took quite some time for most of us to realise that she was actually gone. She was always the one making jokes, always the one making us feel as though problems do not exist in this world. I remember how she loves her toy shark and we would complain each time she brings it with her on holidays. Pangkor 2000 (if I'm not mistaken), the time the girls got the Masterbed room in the apartment, the time our parents brought us to the club (and she simply put her jeans over her PJs, we couldn't stop laughing!).

Time flies. I learned to appreciate the people around me more after that incident. Maybe that is the greatest lesson she has taught me. I know, Chinese New Year would not be the same onwards this year (this is perhaps the only time of the year we'll sit down, gamble, have our annual updates and gossips). I know, when I get married, I'll have one less "ji-mui" a.k.a. sister (i think?) to torture my future husband (I just used a chinese word, just so you know). I know, when I have kids, they'll not know one of my few childhood friends.

I miss you. Hope that you are having fun up there and you better recognise Aimz and I when we join you!

Till then, my 10-hour shift starts tomorrow.

xoxo, -carmen-